Husband needs God\'s power to set him free

[Becky]

I just wanted to give you an update since my last post.  The divorce has never gone through.  We finally had our first hearing in June and because of an adverse ruling by the judge against my husband he told me he was putting things on hold because he was out of money.  Well I would like to have thought he put it on hold for other reasons but I was so relieved as I felt like I was awaiting the execution chamber.  God worked miraculously on my behalf.  

It has now been 13 months since my husband filed for divorce.  There are no hearings pending.  This has been the hardes time of my entire life.

God has been working in my heart and showing me many things.  When my husband left, I felt like a total victim.  He was the one with the drug problem.  However God has begun to show me things in me that needed to be corrected.  

I began to see how I had focused on the negative and in doing so missed the positive things.  For instance, after the court hearing I received a message from my husband telling me how it looks like I had won and he was going to have to put things on hold because he was out of money.  At first I could only see that he was angry and it took several hours to sink in that God had answered my prayer through a series of events that I could have never imagined.  And because of that, even though my husband had been very determined to divorce me, God had other plans.

A month later, my husband had asked to have the dog visit.  That was amazing.  I often heard of other couples that had minor children that seen one another because of the children and I thought there was no reason for us to see each other but God used our dog.

When he brought the dog home, he brought my grandchildren over with him to see me.  I had not seen my grandchildren in months as my daughter no longer had anything to do with me.  Again I almost missed what God had done because I was focusing on some negative things but later God showed me that my husband brought those kids over because he wanted to do something nice for me.

I started making up dinners for my husband to send home with him.  I looked for anything I could do to show kindness in spite of little to any response from my husband.  I had been doing some gardening lately and had transplated a plant and it went into shock and looked dead.  I continued to water that plant for over a month.  I didn\'t see any life in it at all.  I was just about to pull it out and replace it with a new plant when one morning I went out to water it and there was a tiny bud and flower on it.  God showed me that although something may look dead but keep watering, keep sowing like it says in Isaiah, "remember not the former things nor consider the things of old for I will do a new thing, shall you not know it?  It shall spring forth".  Just as the hills in Southern California are brown all summer and then one day you go down the freeway and look and suddenly they are green.  You didn\'t see them turn green, but it just happened.  I may not see what it happening but God is at work.

Then in November, it was my birthday.  My husband sent me a message and asked me to lunch.  It was shocking.  He could not really stand to have much contact with me at all let alone to have a meal together.  He took me to lunch, walked me to my car, hugged me and kissed me goodbye.  When I got home from work that day, my daughter whom I had not seen in 8 months came over with my grandchildren.  I was so stunned.  When she left I just sat on the floor and cried.  I was overjoyed at seeing them, seeing my husband but still so sad because they were not home.

I wrested with discouragement all last week.  Lord, I know you are working but I dont\' see anything.  Then I remembered a sermon I heard Jack Hayfor preach one time, "The God that works in the dark".  God does his best work in the dark when we cannot see.  I\'d like to say I immediately felt better because I didn\'t but I clung to that word.  Then on Sunday morning, I received a text message from my husband saying he was thinking about me and hoped I was doing ok.  I was on my way to church when I got the message but I wanted to pull over and cry my eyes out.  God is working on his heart.  

I still don\'t know what to do but I am learning to rely on God and God alone instead of trying to fix things myself.  I recognized that I had literally pushed God down my husband\'s throat as it was my attempt to get him off the drugs.  I have to learn to trust God to speak to my husband.  I\'ve always struggled with reconciling what it meant to let go and still stand.  I guess I have to let go trying to fix things myself and stand and trust God that He will do exactly what He says.  Easier said than done.  God has begun to work in my heart exactly what it means to be the wife I need to be.  Ashamedly I had studied the Bible nearly all my life but I think I skimmed over the scriptures about being submissive and having an gentle and quiet spirit.  Well I began to study them and I am asking God to help me be what I need to be.  I can make excuses for myself until the cows come home but regardless of the circumstances I have to be obedient to the word of God in my life.

Please continue to pray for restoration of my entire family.  I pray for my husband\'s deliverance every day.

Becky

[David]

Becky . . . .the truth learned from Pastor Jack Hayford is so very powerful.  

Here is a scripture that tells us God sees everything.  Proverbs 15:11

“Even the depths of death and destruction are known by the Lord. How much more does He know the human heart!”

Sometimes we forget that God sees and knows everything.(Read Psalms 139)  What if God were blind and could not see what we do or know what we think? Would our conduct be different? Would we be more careless in how we live? Often what we believe about God has little practical effect on us. Many people forget God and live as if there were no God. We forget that He is always watching us and listening to us, that He remembers everything we do.

The first part of the verse reminds us that death and destruction are in full view of the Lord. Although death is mysterious to us, God knows all about it. If God knows the depths of death and destruction, surely He sees our hearts and knows all about us. We are here today and gone tomorrow (Psalm 90).

How does God know the heart? To what extent does He understand and know our heart? The Bible teaches that God knows the heart so well that He is said to “search” it. “Am I a God who is only in one place?” asks the Lord. “Do they think I cannot see what they are doing? Can anyone hide from me? Am I not everywhere in all the heavens and the earth?” asks the Lord (Jeremiah 23:23-24).
God examines the deepest thoughts of hearts and minds (Jeremiah 11:20). We cannot deceive Him. He knows how much hypocrisy is in our hearts and how much truth there is. “Fire tests the purity of silver and gold, but the Lord tests the heart.” (Proverbs 17:3) In Revelation 2:23 Jesus tells the church, “I am the one who searches out the thoughts and intentions of every person. And I will give to each of you whatever you deserve.”

God does not judge by outward appearances. He weighs our hearts and knows them (Proverbs 24:12). He knows whether we have grace in our hearts or if we are just pretending. He will judge all people according to what they have done. God said that His people in Jeremiah’s day were full of slander and pride. There was no purity in them so God rejected them (Jeremiah 6:27-30). People judge by outward appearances, but the Lord looks at a person’s heart (1 Samuel 16:7).

What is it that God sees in our hearts? God sees everything. He sees the lust and adultery, the hatred and unkindness. “The human heart is most deceitful and desperately wicked. Who really knows how bad it is? But I know! I, the Lord, search all hearts and examine secret motives. I give all people their due rewards” (Jeremiah 17:9-10). We have never committed murder, but we have had murder in our hearts. We imagine evil things. God sees the heart with all its sin and rebellion. God knows everything about it.

The Samaritan woman in John 4 who met Jesus, went back to the village and told everyone, “Come and meet a man who told me everything I ever did! Can this be the Messiah?” (John 4:28-29). We may try to hide our sins from God, but He knows everything about us. The Word of God cuts deep into our innermost thoughts and desires. It exposes us for what we really are. Nothing in all creation can hide from God. Everything is naked and exposed before His eyes. This is the God to whom we must explain all that we have done (Hebrews 4:12-13). On that final day, He shall reward each person according to what they have done. And it will be seen how exact and careful, how personal was God’s knowledge of the heart of every person.

When does God see our hearts? He sees us everywhere and all the time. Perhaps no human eye sees us, but God sees us. We may be away from anyone who knows us. But God sees us.

We cannot hide ourselves anywhere where God will not see us. God sees us even when we think we are hidden. He looks from heaven and His eye sees through the darkness. God sees our hearts.

Psalms 139

7 Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence?
8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea,
10 even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast.
11 If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,"
12 even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you.


Keep encouraged Becky.  God sees very well in the darkest times of our life.  He sees beyond and to the very end of our times.

David B